I Want Him
by ZashleySilver
Summary: I want him. I want him so bad. I don’t remember ever wanting anything or anyone more than I want him.I want him to be in love. I just want it all to be with me. But it’s not." Sharpay's POV. dedicated to xoblue! COMPLETE!


**Hey! This is just a oneshot, dedicated to one of my favorite authors and best friends here on FanFiction: xoblue! Love Jenna **

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I want him. I want him so bad. I don't remember ever wanting anything or anyone more than I want him. Him, the boy of my dreams. Well, at least that's what I thought when I was seven. But now I'm 17. And I still want him, ten years later. Only now, he's the man of my dreams.

And he has turned into a man now. His hair has gotten darker over the years, and he's gotten a bit tanner. His face has matured from its seven year old self, like any boy's does. But one thing that hasn't changed is his eyes. His eyes make me quiver when I see them. I basically melt to the ground when they're looking at me personally. They just make me weak.

He's also gotten taller. When we were in like fifth grade, we were always the same height. Then in middle school and freshman year of high school, I was taller than him. But not anymore. Now, he's a good half a foot taller than me. But I don't mind. I love how if I wanna look him in the eye, I have to tilt my head up. It doesn't matter to me. It just makes me love him more.

And he's defiantly been working out. I mean, you can't tell me you haven't seen his muscles! He could pick me up with one hand probably!

Despite his manly, tough outer appearance, I know he's a real softie. Like once I was walking in the cafeteria and broke a heal and dropped my lunch, and he gave me his own lunch. He didn't just leave me there like everyone else, he didn't just help me up, and he didn't just offer to buy me a new lunch; he gave me his own food. I thought that was super sweet. And everyday, even though most of his basketball buddies still think of me as the Ice Princess, he says hi to me. Sometimes if I'm lucky, I also get a compliment. Chad slaps him upside the head every time, but I don't think it matters. Defiantly not for me, I know that. And probably not for him either, because if it did matter to him, he would still say hi to me everyday and get a head slap from Chad. 

This is only part of the incredibly long schpeal that would take me days to say about why I want this boy. But then I worry, that his boy doesn't want me.

I mean, hello, he's on the basketball team. Therefore, totally popular. And not only that, but he's good at basketball. Really, really good. I come to everyone of his games, even away, and everyone of his practices. But he doesn't ever seem to realize I'm there for him. Everyone else on his team does, so why doesn't he?

Also, he doesn't like what I like. He'd prefer to play basketball or another sport, stay home and watch movies, or just hang out with his cool family than what I'd like to do: go shopping, go to expensive restaurants, or act, sing, and dance on stage. If we were ever together, what would we do? What would we talk about? Would anything happen whatsoever?

And the worst part of this whole thing, the one thing that's keeping me away from just planting one on the boy, is that he has a girlfriend. As much as I hate to say it, he has a beautiful, talented, extremely nice, and just flawlessly perfect girlfriend. They're been dating since junior year, and everyday that they're still together makes my heart sink lower and lower. If he has to have a girlfriend, I want it to be me. I know his girlfriend well, very well in fact. And I know she doesn't love this boy as much as I do. I know she doesn't want this boy as much as I do. That's too impossible. I know all that for a fact. But what I don't know is if he really loves her that much. And if he does, I don't know how I'd feel.

I'm thought of as the Ice Princess. And I am somewhat of a princess. Everyone thinks I get everything and anything I want. And that's partially true. I can just ask my daddy for something, anything, and it's mine. But there is something I want that no one knows of that I don't have. And that's him, the boy I want and love so much.

One day at school I was just walking down the hall to class. I heard people talking about him and his girlfriend, and how strong they were going. I heard of how he was really in love. And that just saddened me. I want him to be happy, don't get me wrong. I want him to be in love. I just want it all to be with me. But it's not.

The next day I was walking down the halls of my school, still hearing nothing but him and his girlfriend and how in love they are. I guess they are in love. But not as in love as I am with him. And even though he's in love with another girl, I still love him. I still want him.

Later that day, I was sitting by myself at lunch, high above everyone else. And when I looked down, I saw kids eating and just hanging. But I never really noticed any of that. All I could see was how he was sitting with nobody but his girlfriend. All they were doing was smiling and starring into each others' eyes. This made tears fill my own eyes. I knew if he was doing that with me, he'd wipe my tears away. But he's not, so he isn't. Because he's not with me, but with his girlfriend, my tears just fall to the red lunch table surface.

That night, I was looking through my old journal. And as I read every page I noticed something: it was all about him. There wasn't one word in that hundred-page old journal of mine that wasn't somehow related to this boy that I wanted and loved so much. In the very back was a little message I had written back when I first met this boy. And in my messy little kid handwriting I had written how I promised to never stop loving this boy. And in messy little boy handwriting underneath my promise, he wrote the same thing about never stop loving me. If only he could read that now. Then maybe the hurt from knowing he didn't keep that promise would fade away.

The next day, I slowly walked into school, the words he had written so long ago still etched in my brain. I was so distracted, I walked straight into some lockers.

I winced in pain, as everyone around laughed and snickered. I was rubbing my nose, trying to block everyone out, as I opened my locker door. And when I did, a folded up piece of paper feel to my flip-flop covered feet. I bent down, picked the piece of paper up, and opened it.

Inside, in some boy's handwriting, the paper told me to meet this mystery boy on the rooftop garden before classes started. I closed my locker door and started to the stairs that would lead me to the garden. The whole walk there, I heard people beginning to talk about the boy I loved and his girlfriend. Too upset to listen, I tuned them all out and ran up the stairs. I didn't need my heart to be torn more than it already was.

As I began to see sunlight, I also saw the clear bye sky. It reminded me of the days in summer when he and I would look at the clouds and try to find shapes in them. A man's coughing took me out of my daze. I turned my head around over to where a red wooden bench was, and my eyes widened. It was him.

"Hey Sharpay," he said smiling shyly, standing up and walking over to me.

"Why did you ask me to come up here?" I asked, still not believing the boy I've been secretly loving for ten years was standing before me, have been telling me to come up to a secret garden on top of the school.

"I kinda wanted you to be the first to know something important," he said, his face slowly becoming more serious.

"Why me first?" I asked. His smile came back a bit.

"Because I wanted the girl who's had a crush on me for years to know first," he grinned. My cheeks turned as red as they do when I get sunburned.

"H-huh?" I asked, not knowing how to respond to that. His face once again was serious.

"I broke up with my girlfriend," he said. My eyes widened more.

"What?" I asked, flabbergasted. "Why? I thought you two . . ." I trailed off, knowing I'd cry if I said the last part. But I had to now. "I thought you were in love?" I asked, tears now starting to form in my eyes. He smirked, stepping closer to me, so that now we were a few inches apart, and I could feel his warm breath on my skin, getting goose bumps on my arms.

"I am in love," he said, "just with the girl I promised ten years ago I'd love forever."

"Who's that?" I asked. He smiled, leaning down to my level.

"You," he whispered so quietly it was barely audible, before his lips began touch, feeling my own.

I slowly closed my eyes, enjoying every beautiful feeling I was feeling this moment. Right now, I was experiencing the most soft, gentle, tender, yet passionate and romantic kiss I have had and probably ever will in m life.

Before I wanted to, his lips pulled away from mine. We started at each other in the eye for a moment, before one of the worst things that could have happened, happened: the bell rang. He just smirked a little before giving me a quick peck on the lips.

"See ya in homeroom, Sharpay," he said. And with that, he walked away from me, down the steps, and into East High.

"Bye Jason," I said, a small smile playing onto my freshly kissed lips.


End file.
